


Crisis Point

by Fenchurch87



Series: Tales of Kirkwall (and Beyond) [14]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-26
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2019-06-16 18:45:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15443445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fenchurch87/pseuds/Fenchurch87
Summary: Varric's thoughts after Anders blows up the Chantry. Originally written in response to a writing prompt on /r/dragonage.





	Crisis Point

_I am so sick of templars and mages._ Varric watched Hawke approach Anders, feeling like he had just been punched repeatedly in the stomach. _What must she be going through right now?_ he wondered. _Shit, Blondie. Why did you have to go and ruin everything?_

Anders was sitting on a crate, facing away from everyone. He must have heard Hawke's footsteps, but he didn't turn around, not even when Hawke stopped and spoke to him.

“You lied to me.” There was steel in Hawke's voice. Varric could count on one hand the number of people he'd heard her use that tone with. The blood mage who had killed her mother. Corypheus. And now the man she loved.

“I had to.” Anders stared at the ground. “I thought you might have tried to stop me. Or worse, what if you wanted to help? I couldn't let you do that.”

“I did help, Anders. I found the ingredients for you. I distracted the Grand Cleric while you planted the bomb. You've killed hundreds of innocent people, and I helped you! I helped a murderer!” Hawke's last word came out almost as a sob.

Anders slumped on his crate. “I'm sorry.”

Varric heard Hawke take a deep breath. “You should have told me what you were planning. We could have found another way.”

“There is no other way. This is the justice all mages have awaited.”

Hawke shook her head. “Did Justice make you do this?” she asked quietly.

“No. We are one now. I can no more ignore the injustice of the Circle than he could.”

Hawke stifled another sob. _She was hoping he would say yes_ , Varric realised. He had been hoping that too. He had wanted this to be Justice's doing, had wanted to believe that Anders hadn't been in control of his actions. Because it was easier to accept than the truth. _Oh, Blondie._

“You have to die for this.” Hawke's voice sounded strangely calm now.

Anders nodded. “The world needs to see that the Circle isn't a solution. And if I pay for that with my life, then I pay. Maybe then Justice will be free.”

Hawke drew her dagger and took a small step towards Anders. And then another. One more, and she would be close enough to... _Can she really go through with this?_

Varric could see that Hawke was shaking. She remained still for a long time, staring at the dagger. Anders sat on his crate, bracing himself for death.

A death that never came. Varric thought he heard Hawke whisper something as she slowly lowered the dagger. It sounded like “I can't”.

“Help me defend the mages.” Hawke might have spared Anders's life, but there was no warmth in her voice. The steel was back, harder than ever.

“You're letting me stay?” Anders stood up and finally turned to face Hawke. “I didn't think you would, but I'll help you fight the templars. Damned right I will.” He reached out a hand towards her. “Hawke–”

“Don't.” Hawke shrugged him off and walked away. Her eyes briefly met Varric's, and he saw that they were shining with unshed tears.

Varric found himself walking beside Anders as they followed Hawke towards the Gallows. He didn't speak to his former friend. He could barely even look at him. The guilt and regret in Anders's face were clear, but there was something else there too. Something that gave Varric a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach every time he saw it.

_Triumph._

 


End file.
